Marriage is hard. It takes work. It takes being intentional. It requires effort to have the marriage that we desire. Let’s look at some practical ways to keeping your marriage alive.
The best marriage advice I have ever received is to not let your partner be your Savior.
There is only one person who can be my Savior and that is Jesus Christ.
I cannot expect Dustin to be perfect and to meet my every need. He will fail and so will I.
When you are pouring into your marriage, it is important to give your spouse grace.
Looking at your marriage through the lens of grace and forgiveness is key in keeping your marriage alive. He will not always do exactly as you want and (gasp!) he cannot read your mind.
Be open, be honest, and communicate with each other.
Date nights are talked about a lot. And for good reason.
Getting away with your spouse without kids is important.
This does not have to be an expensive outing. It can be a quick meal at Chipotle. It can be a date night in. What is important is that you are intentional about making it happen.
I know that Dustin and I have ups and downs with date nights. Sometimes he is so busy that it is impossible to fit them in. Sometimes I am too tired to go anywhere.
This year I know we both want to be more intentional about making date nights a priority. Our best conversations happen when it is just the two of us. We share our dreams, our hearts, and just reconnect on a deeper level.
In fact, we want to take this one step further and be sure that each and every day, we are doing something together just the two of us.
Sometimes this is a ping pong game. Sometimes this is just reading in bed holding hands.
Taking the time to reconnect with your spouse is key in keeping your marriage alive. Kids can and will literally suck the air right out of your marriage. When you have children, you need to pour into your marriage even more to make up what those little blessings can suck right out of the two of you.
Put the time in to see your marriage grow.
If you need some inspiration, here are some super cute winter date night ideas from Marquis at Simply Clarke.
Six sisters stuff also has 32 Stay-at-home date ideas that look like a lot of fun.
Look for the good in your spouse.
Focus on what you were attracted to in the first place.
We all change as the years pass us by. It is just a a fact that as the years go by, we are going to change.
But we can still remember what attracted us to our mate. There is something there that made you want to get married.
Find it and hold onto it. When the storms clouds roll in, look for the good in your spouse to keep Satan at bay when he is attacking your marriage. Write your thoughts down in a journal if that will help you stay focused on the good.
PRAY. Pray together out loud. Pray for your husband daily.
One of my favorite books for this is Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe. Sharon Jaynes divides prayers into 30 days that are several pages long. I have found that if I break this up into more manageable pieces that I am more likely to make it happen.
I choose one prayer from one of the days and pray for it over my husband throughout the day.
This morning I prayed for Dustin’s mind. That Dustin would be meditating on Scripture. That he would guard his mind and keep it focused on Jesus. That anything that came into his mind that was against the word of God would be put away from him. This is something simple and tangible that I can focus on throughout the day as my husband is at work.
Finally, have fun. Make life with your spouse fun.
Dustin and I are always making each other laugh.
We talk to each other in funny accents. Have silly nicknames. Make up funny international holidays such as international give your spouse a massage day or international you have all the dirty diaper days.
Just something fun and silly to keep the mood light and the two of us laughing together.
Laughing truly is the best medicine. When you are light-hearted and fun with your spouse, the whole mood of your house becomes happy.
It is also important to be sure you bring this enthusiasm into the bedroom. Pleasing your spouse sexually is essential in keeping your marriage alive. You are the only person who can fulfill this need for your husband. It is important to make it a priority.
Our marriages are on the line and under attack.
It is the most important relationship we will have on this Earth. In order to keep our marriages alive, we need to make them a priority each and every day.
Write love notes, be silly, fall in love all over again.
Find ways to not only keep your marriage alive, but to demonstrate to your children what a beautiful thing marriage is. Intentional parenting is all about keeping our eyes on the outcome. We want our children to sometimes be in a strong marriage so let us commit to providing that example for them today and every day.